Saturday, August 04, 2007

If you marry a divorced woman, you're committing adultery!

Matthew 5:32b ...and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.

(See also Matthew 19:9)

PERSONAL COMMENTARY

If your wife was previously divorced, you're in a perpetual state of adultery.

I'm not sure what to recommend to those in this situation. Please don't attempt to divorce your wife to free yourself from this sin. We'll show later that God hates divorce (which could be also considered a sin). This is truly being between a rock and a hard place.

90 comments:

Little Green Jedi said...

It was just this rock and a hard place that started me on my way to atheism. The struggle that this put me in regarding my Wife and I forced me to see the contradictory nature of the bible and the way apologists seek to reconcile god with conscience. It was the straw that broke my back.

space said...

lol!! Everyone wants an excuse to divorce their partner. No one wants to be tied down.

Perhaps if people took marriage a little more seriously, more thought and consideration would go into selecting who you're going to spend the rest of your life with.

Romans 7 and 1 Cor. 7 are worthwhile reading as well. The question that should be asked is, "Is there ever a circumstance where God permits divorce"? It's an indepth study but I would suggest that in cases where the husband or wife becomes an unbeliever (symbolically 'dead' to God), the partner is free to remarry.

Johnny said...

(Sorry so long) Are there situations where God allows divorce? Of course, due to the hardness of our hearts. Jesus said that Himself. Are there situations where God allows remarriage? Only under very very specific circumstances, and only inferred by exclusion of those whose remarriage is adultery (I mean that the Bible states that some remarriages are adultery, so there must be some that aren't). The Bible is crystal clear about God's command. What puzzles me is how wishy washy people are when they want their way. People can justify anything, I guess.

With regards to those passages which free a spouse from their bounds of marriage; I don't read those passages as saying that they're free to remarry. They're just no longer under the bonds of that marriage. That person now becomes "divorced". The passages in 1 Cor 7 about "but if you do marry, you do not sin" is in reference to VIRGINS, not a license to remarry. It doesn't say, "but if you do remarry, you do not sin".Read it again with that in mind - it'll make more sense and not contradict the rest of the Bible.

Tough situation, eh? Not everyone can accept these words, and so be it. For me, I've struggled with the notion of remarriage for 4 1/2 years. Although she divorced me, I feel that it would be more honoring to God that I live as Paul and not remarry. God could change my heart on this, but right now, I feel that remarriage would be incredibly selfish on my part. And that's not why I'm here.

Anonymous said...

I'm having doubts about what Johnny said. 1 Cor 7:27 says that if you are unmarried, you can marry...it doesn't say, "If you are Scripturally divorced or if you are never married, you can marry."

Isn't Paul saying that anyone can remarry. It sounds harsh to say that no one can remarry. Maybe when Jesus said it is adultery to marry a divorced woman, he was explaining the ideal, not forcing 60% of the population into celibacy.

If you take the passage literally, then only men have the right to divorce their wives; Jesus never gave permission for a woman to divorce her husband under any situation.

So since this is a "literal" website, we should try to figure out what is literal in the Bible. James said if we break one law we are guilty of breaking all of it; he wasn't being literal there, maybe Jesus was just explaining the ideal.

More Christ Like said...

Leslie McFall has an interesting way to deal with the so-called exception clause in Matthew 19:9 that appears to allow for divorce and remarriage for marriage unfaithfulness.
He has written a 43 page paper that reviews the changes in the Greek made by Erasmus that effect the way Matthew 19:9 has been translated. I reviewed McFall's paper at Except For Fornication Clause of Matthew 19:9. I would love to hear some feedback on this position.

Anonymous said...

Christians OBEY christ, it is not the hearers of god word that are righteous, in fact many are going to eternal hell, many who claim to be christian. The bible is the word of GOD. It is literal. Any woman who divorces her husband, and remarries another man commits adultery. There is no clause. She betrays christ, the father in heaven and all the apostles who carried out the work of christ. AND THE MAN WHO MARRIES A DIVORCED WOMAN also OMMITS ADULTERY. Mark 10 12, Luke 16 18 and the book of romans all teach the same. Proverbs teaches that his new divorced and remarried wife is pretty wicked, and her mouth is a pit of death. This is opposite from the woman of god.

Any man who divorces but for One reason being infideltiy and remarries also commits adultery.

The book of corinthians teaches DO NOT BE DECIEVED ADULTERERS WILL NOT INHERIT THE KINGDOME OF GOD.

ADULTERERS ARE DEFINED AS THOSE IN WHICH A MAN MARRIEDS A DIVORCED WOMAN, ETC ETC

IT IS CLEAR ,, THESE ARE NOT GODS PEOPLE, AND THEY ARE NOT HIS CHILDREN.

SO Any OF those who betray christ are not brothers and/ or sisters IN christ, simply because they promote deception and live in it.
it is wicked.

They deceive themselves and work to destroy the faith and purity of the body of christ. And, their NEW spouses could go to hell because of them. That is the opposite of love. To endanger anothers eternal relationship with god for your own selfish gain??? God warns adulterers , that as enemies of god they are also friends with the world.

Proverbs teaches the wicked adulterer (divorced woman who remarries) is opposite to the woman of grace and dignitity. The proverbial woman is NOT a remarried woman,but can be a widow or divorced woman or a single woman who abides in christ.

The proverbial woman fears our lord and abides in his teachings.
It is truly a wicked generation, adulterers feel no shame they betray christ, their family, and even their own children for adultery.

Where there is adultery, there is a child paying the price for the selfishness of mostly the divorced and remarried woman there is no clause for exception, or the man who abandons his faithful wife and remarries another,

This world is so deceived it is scary, even scaried when it is done under folks who go to church and outwardly they profest christ - they know nothing of christ.

Porter said...

I married a divorced woman, who proved not to be faithful. She said I never respected her, and she was right. I tried to go to counseling, and make it right. It didn't happen. I fasted and prayed while going through divorce with her, wanting to save the marriage, that didn't work. Not until the divorce was finalized, did I realize the truth. The relationship was not founded on the truth, but on the flesh. That period of prayer and fasting regenerated my faith, and I thank the Lord that I am now truly born again.
The original post by Roopster included an entreaty not to divorce your wife to free yourself from this sin. This entreaty is in error. Why? Because if you marry a divorced woman you are in fact not in a Biblically legitimate marriage, regardless of whether you got an official license from the courthouse. The Bible is our guide, not the local laws that may now even issue a license for homosexual marriage. Having been celibate now for nearly ten years, it can be difficult being single, on the other hand it can be liberating if you truly want to focus on the work of the Lord. It comes down to what is most important to you. PTLJ!

Anonymous said...

I think you must read the bible in context. Jesus is talking to the pharasees. They are the teachers of the law. If you want to be literal, it is written for the believers. The version that i read is from NIV, Jesus never says if u marry a divorced woman, you are committing adultery. Please put your version that you read from for stumbling others is no good.

Anonymous said...

What can one say...I read the verses of Matthew 5 about divorce, but find that when you read the entire message, it takes on a different tone. I don't think Jesus was saying that a man can not marry a divorced woman....He pointed out it was a 'law'. If you backtrack, He sarcasticly put down the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees because they couldn't keep their own rules, either. Jesus then said, despite what you didn't learn from the Law, you 'should' have learned to love your neighbor or enemy as yourself, etc.

Anonymous said...

Love is the message of Christ. Only He can condemn. We tend to see what we want to see. Let go and let God works everytime. Some of the comments above make my heart hurt. Faith thru fear is not faith at all. I wish all the blessings possible on all those affected by this blog.

Anonymous said...

The first marriage covenant is more permanent than the physical fabric of the universe: Luke 16:16,17,18.

Anonymous said...

How can you take everything so literally when Jesus himself spoke in parables and metaphors? The book of Matthew is simply an accounting of one person. He happens to take everything literally because Matthew had a literal type of personality. He was a tax collector...it makes sense. That is why it is important to read Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John...along with the rest of the Bible. You will gain more perspective. The Bible is God breathed, however, they are also subject to their own time, and it is written by man. Much like one of you commented- A man not being able to divorce at the time was against the law of the time. Matthews comment could have been more in reference to the law. After all, he worked for the government, and so breaking the law probably wasn't his cup of tea, and it is clear the God wishes we respect authority so long as it is in the scope of his teaching.

My dad married my mother who was once divorced because the original man she married turned out to be a terrible, terrible man. I am confident in saying, that God would not have wanted my mother to stay in this marriage. However, after the divorce, she was left with 3 children to raise on her own. And being a single mother with three children in this day and age is next to impossible to withstand...especially if you have not yet accepted Christ into your life.

My dad adopted my older brothers and married my mother. This all took place before they came to Christ. They then became Christians, and had my little sister and I. My Dad is one of the godliest men I know and he was used by God to bring a broken family together. And I can say I am truly saved because my dad allowed himself to be used by God through out my life.

I understand many want to take the Bible literally, but all of it simply cant. It is subject to metaphors, contradictions, and era. Simply live your life the best you can, and Love like Jesus has taught. The rest is up to our father in heaven to judge.

Anonymous said...

The bible is to be taken literally and if one has had a "good" remarriage experience, he or she should count themselves blessed by it, but no doubt, it would have been better to have remained UN-remarried and let God do whatever mighty work in the life He would. We ALL tend to view EVERYTHING from a worldly perspective and justify ANY behavior, regardless of what scripture says. But in the end, if we truly want to be obedient, there is no denying the hard lessons Jesus/Yahushuah teaches and even He says not ALL can hear them. Thus, many will be on His right and many will be on His left. The scripture Matthew 7:21-23 plainly states that there will MANY who believe themselves to "Christian" who will not be accepted by Jesus. This scripture can mean NO OTHER than those who believe they are saved by Jesus, for NO OTHERS on the planet would call Him "Lord, Lord." This scripture alone is enough to make people truly consider their motives and so-called obedience to The Most High God and His Son, Jesus/Yahushuah. No small matter, indeed.

BIGMAC5487 said...

@ Porter, thanks for sharing, it's liberating to hear men standing for the true word's of Christ. I've never been married but recently fell in love with a divorced woman, i had to cut the relationship when i started to study the topic of marriage and divorce. It was the hardest thing i had to do! i know you may struggle at times but to read your comment on here nearly made me jump for joy. Thank you for making the sacrifice, i continue to make sacrifices for Him, in order that i may reign in His Kingdom.

Matthew 19:10-11
The disciples *said to Him, “If the relationship of the man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry.” 11 But He said to them, “ Not all men can accept this statement, but only those to whom it has been given.

Praise be to God.

Livechristlike said...

you are so right the word of god is in those who believe thank you for the word

Livechristlike said...

Amen

HeathersCorner said...

Yes indeed, how funny when the bible strikes a cord we thought we believed in. Many people will change the words, so they can just go on living with out the Lords word.
Very nicely written, thanks for sharing this.
Heather

EGL408 said...

With respect, “Little Green Jedi” is not looking at Scripture at its whole. The Bible does not contradict—“Little Green Jedi” is. He says,” It was just this rock and a hard place that started me on my way to atheism.” However, in the end of his message he says,” It was the straw that broke my back.”
So, were there many other “straws” because for one straw to break a back there had to be more!
Now this is personal territory and I won’t dig, especially since this is already personal with Little Green Jedi ,” The struggle that this put me in regarding my Wife…”
I appreciate that you love your wife, unfortunately there aren’t enough real men that do.
But I finish with this, God loves you. Jesus Himself said that He would not forsake anyone. “I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” (John 14:18)

HeathersCorner said...

Well like most people, they change the truth. It is spoken very clear about divorce.
So i guess : do you take the extra mile, or the short cut

Joanne said...

Stumbled on this post looking for something else. I just wanted to say to "Porter" and "Bigmac" ... amen. I appreciate the truths you have shared.

The scriptures are clear: no adulterer will enter into the kingdom of heaven. If you are married to a divorced person, you are living in adultery. To stay in such a 'marriage' (though not a true marriage in God's eyes) is to choose to stay in sin. Sin will not enter heaven.

Little Green Jedi ... it is you who much change, not the scriptures. Whether we like it or not, truth is truth. We have a choice. Christ will not force us to follow after him.

Anonymous said...

Let me ask this. A woman divorces her husband for 1. Killing their 6 week old child 2. Having and viewing child porn and other porn..... Which is technically adultery.

My question is. If the woman meets a man and the man has never been married. Can they get married and it not be considered adultery?

Joanne said...

Anonymous: Jesus said: whosoever marries her that is divorced is committing adultery.

In this "what if" scenario, just because the man commits murder and adultery does not mean his wife can marry someone else. They are one flesh till death separates them.

The LORD says: "Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband"

We must be careful not to put a question mark where God clearly has put a period.

Anonymous said...

Ok. In that situation to reconcile the husband must make good with his wife and ask for forgiveness from the two things he did wrong. If the husband truely repents from adultery.... Why cannot the remarry and ask for forgiveness from the same sin, adultery.


.... Also this is not a what if question. This is a true story. This is about my current girlfriend who has my child in her. If I marry her so we dont bring up the child in a broken home.....im going to hell? If we separate and raise the child individually, he is raised in a broken home and that causes all sorts of issues down the line. I know I did wrong. I want to know how to correct it.

- Nick

Anonymous said...

I didnt proofread.


If the remarried wife repents, isnt it the same as if the bad husband repents for the same sin in order to reconcile

Anonymous said...

I didnt proofread.
What I meant was

If the remarried wife repents, isnt it the same as if the bad husband repents for the same sin in order to reconcile

Joanne said...

Nick - The Lord is clear. To be married to the divorced is adultery. You said it yourself - she is divorced. The Lord tells her what she can do: remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. That's it. As long as he is alive, there is a chance he will repent and seek to reconcile the relationship. We cannot let our emotions get in the way of the truth. Whether we like it or not, the Lord says what he says. We cannot just ignore it or change it to suite our needs. I'm not trying to sound rude here, just realistic.

On a side note, you cannot marry a woman, live in adultery, and think that the Lord will forgive you. If you are still in the adulterous relationship, there is no room for forgiveness. It's like someone steeling your car, asking you to forgive them, and then they drive away in your car. They can say "sorry" all they want and ask for forgiveness all they want, but if they do not actually STOP DOING the sin they were doing, then they are not really sorry and forgiveness cannot be had. Or a gay couple. They get 'married' today you know. If they start following the Lord, they cannot say "Sorry, please forgive us" and then keep living as a gay couple. No thief, adulterer or gay person is going to get into the kingdom of heaven. They must repent ... and that means stop doing the sins they are doing and start doing what the Lord says.

I pray you follow after the truth.

DI said...

"Therefore I say to you, any sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven people, but blasphemy against the Spirit shall not be forgiven. Whoever speaks a word against the Son of Man, it shall be forgiven him; but whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit, it shall not be forgiven him, either in this age or in the age to come". (Matthew 12:31-32) Please note that divorce, remarriage or even adultery do not qualify for the unforgivable sin, and thus each person who commits those things can repent and be forgiven even if the divorce or remarriage was illegitimate.

Jeremy E Young said...

Jesus Christ is amazing! Let His spirit in you control your mind, remeber folks: this is to all of you-He died to set you free,to return you to relationship with the Father, He is the only thing that justifies you. No this does not mean to continue in SIN it means to love, obey, to live like Christ lives with compassion, love, forgiveness. What happened to Grace?!!! Have you not forgotten what the Lord taught about love. Love, unconditional love! How dare you who tell another that they are Going to Hell for remarrying or divorcing. Ask your Lord to show His heart to you and ask Him for forgiveness in the way you have alienated your hearts to His children . LOVE is the greatest of all of these. Jesus is LOVE, He taught LOVE, It's not for you to judge for no man is good, no man is Holy. If not for the blood of Christ Jesus our Lord and His sacrifice all would perrish. Laws were meant to show us our wickedness and perversedness to bring us to God. God knew laws could not be kept so he gave them to help us see our error and the only way we go to Heaven is not through "works" or in other words; in the keeping of the Law, but only by the BLOOD OF THE PRESCIOUS LORD JESUS CHRIST!!!

Joanne said...

The law is a school master.

A math teacher teaches his students math. He does not teach math to prove to his students that they cannot do math! He teaches math to prove to his students that they CAN do math!

Our Master and Lord expects us to obey what he has taught us.

Serritha Johnson said...

This is sooo scary. Who wants to spend the rest of their life alone and celibate?! I've never been married, but if we are forgiven and given a clean slate, can't a divorcee be forgiven as well? A murder who kills children can be forgiven and have another child, a theft can steal, be forgiven and get a job, a single rapist can rape, be forgiven and marry with no eternal condemnation, but not a divorced person? I truly don't understand.

HeathersCorner said...

Why dont you want to hear the truth, I guess you can delete my last post as you did, funny the truth, not many want to hear.

Joanne said...

Serritha - a divorced person can be forgiven ... but they must remain single. Just like a murderer can be forgiven ... but they must stop murdering. A thief can be forgiven ... but they must stop stealing. Forgiveness has conditions: we must STOP sinning.

mummeez said...

Joanne, i agree with you... that to seek forgiveness we must to stop sinning. But how can remarry is a sin? We start a marriage not with thought that we going to have divorce, don't we?
Or if the husband do violence, should the woman stick with him until someday he might kill her? And she stated as a martyr?

Anonymous said...

I stuck with my husband through infidelity and severe domestic violence. But when he attempted to sexually molest my very own mom many times in a span of 4 years, I could not take it anymore. I had to confront him. He admitted that he had such intention, then tried to destroy my body with acid because I dared to confront him. Or maybe he was scared I might tell people the truth. In fact, he would not even give me a divorce. I've been living as a single mom close to 3 years after running away with our child. We are living hidden, far apart from our family and relatives because he is so violent. I grew weary and am thinking if by any miracle he decides to marry one of his women and divirces me, let it be. But then, the prospect of having to be alone forever is horrible. While he remarries, I must be alone and live the consequences of his evil doing? I'm still thinking through all this but I truly believe God knows hearts and all circumstances. I'm actually a pastor's wife and used to be against divorce more than anyone else. That's why I endured. But as I went through this ordeal, my perception changed. I now think God forgives divorce and remarriage just like other sins given circumstances. He knows our hearts and intentions. If we make s casual habit out of marrying and divorcing just because God is forgiving, that would be an abuse of His love. But there are other extreme cases like mine. If a husband continuously tries to kill or harm a wife to cover his dark secrets, and ends up abandoning, divorcing, and remarrying another like in my case, will God really be so harsh and demand a divorced woman to stay alone for the rest of her life? Isn't this something between God and herself?

Livechristlike said...

Let us do the will of God if we want to enter the kingdom of God. Jesus asked peter in John 21 "Do you love me" "Feed my sheep". That means that we must do what Jesus askes us to do if we love him. One way to love him is to keep his commandments. In Matt. ch.5 and 19,Mk.ch 10, Luke ch. 16 KJV he states that marrying someone after divorce is adultery. The exception he gave and its 2 exceptions, (1) only by fornication and this is due by being together in the jewish custom called bethroth or "engaged" and (2) by death of one's spouse. Anyone who wants to do otherwise cannot enter in the kingdom of Heaven. 1 cor. ch7

Jon said...

My dad was divorced from his first wive after 7 years of marriage. They had 2 kids. His first wive is still living. He later married my mom and they had me. Dad's first wive would not have anything to do with thier kids, so my mom took them in and raised them as if they were her own. She is the only mom they have ever known. Mom and dad has been happily married for 37 years now. They were both saved before they married. They have went to church and served God all thier lives. Almost every christian website I have found on the internet say's that they are living in adultery and the only way to repent is to divorce. There has to be something in God's word about divorce and remarriage that people are missing, cause I can not understand why they would have to divorce. It would destroy our family.

Joanne said...

Dear Anonymous with the extreme case: If you need help, please contact me. Yes, there are extreme cases ... and yes, there are times when a woman must depart due to these extreme cases. But even in those cases the Lord is very clear: "Let not the wife depart from her husband. But if she does (and this 'but' is for extreme cases) let her remain single or be reconciled to her husband." 1 Cor. 7.

If separation is a must, then you are to remain single and faithful and pray for his repentance.

Once again, if you need help, please contact me. joannesmith6819 at gmail

Lord bless you.

Anonymous said...

"Although she divorced me, I feel that it would be more honoring to God that I live as Paul and not remarry. God could change my heart on this, but right now, I feel that remarriage would be incredibly selfish on my part. And that's not why I'm here."

Wow, I can only imagine how hard that must have been, sincerely, standing ovation sir.

30: "...the LORD declares,... those who honor Me I will honor, and those who despise Me will be lightly esteemed."
1 Samuel 2:30 NASB

God bless you.

Anonymous said...

I am 41, and have never married nor had children; which i prayed about over the last fifteen years, since i was engaged at 26 (my fiance broke our engagement, and though i prayed to be reconciled with him, it never happened and he has since remarried). Months ago, i met a nice man online who i go on dates with. I have not let this relationship become serious, because he has been married twice. Both women left him after cheating on him (hes a nice guy who can be a little boring). He said he tried to get them to go to counseling but both divorced him anyway. If i were to become serious with this man, would this make me an adulteress? I told him i have to figure this out before i let this become serious (we only go on dinner/movie dates). My second question is: i have had sexual relationships with boyfriends in the past ( which the fornication is a sin in itself); however there was a man i was involved with that lied to me about being married....does this make me an adulteress for having sex with someone i thought was unmarried?

Anonymous said...

Correction: my exfiance married not remarried. I recently read something that makes it appear that if you are engaged you are virtually married in Gods eyes. So please clarify that as well. It is so hard never being married, over 40 with no kids. Its lonely. People treat you as though sonethings wrong with you or like youre not as mature as they are. Dating is horrible, because no one dates without sex being involved. I prayed for fifteen years to meet my future husband, but society has changed. People are using each other and im just tired of it. Now in faced with all the men i meet being divorced, having several kids, possibly gay but hiding it, or they have so many women to choose from that they are noncommittal. And if you do find a boyfriend these days...they surely wont stay with you and sex not be involved. Im torn on that too. In 1 Cor i read before that if a woman passes the age of deflowering then a man may be with her in that way. At 41, isnt that passed the age if deflowering?

Anonymous said...

Wow...there seems to be alot of condemnation here...not just a passion for the Word of God. I am in absolute agreement with taking the Word of God literally. I also do believe that things were written that addressed contemporary issues. All scripture is profitable for instruction and training. But, if we are going to pass judgement on others without knowing their whole story or how God has uniquely worked in their lives, aren't we also in danger of condemning ourselves, according to the Word?

I do appreciate what "space" said "if people took marriage a little more seiously, more thought and consideration would go into selecting who you're going to spend the rest of your life with"...great point. That in itself would save alot of marriages.

God is a big God and can do and say whatever He likes for His own purposes. Even throw a wrench in what we think we understand. Such as the commandment "Do not kill" and yet, several times in scripture He commands his people to do exactly that. Is it that God is hypocritical? By NO MEANS! He is accomplishing His will by His purposes and it seems contradictory to us. He is not contradictory.

I was married to a pastor for 32 years (youth pastor then senior pastor). He passed away and I have since remarried a wonderful man who loves, loves Jesus and people and wants nothing more than to serve Christ with his whole life. What a blessed girl I am. And, yet...he was divorced. God absolutely brought Him into my life. Outside of God we NEVER would have met. Our meeting was birthed out of much prayer and desiring to do God's will, only. He was not following Christ at the time of his divorce...his wife left him and subsequently divorced him. After the divorce reconciliation was not possible.

Anyway, I am obviously fully aware of what the Word says about divorce and remarriage and, yet, truy know God's hand of blessing on my life. I don't get it. But someday all of it will be clear.

In the meantime...I have learned through my situation is to extend grace where I do not understand a situation, rather than condemnation. Jesus does a pretty good job at being Judge. And I stand before Him as His child, uncondemned.

Anonymous said...

Im the anonymous person from 7/22. I try not to pass judgement on what others do, cause they will answer to God alone. We have all committed sin knowingly and unknowingly. However for myself, id like to start living my life better to please Jesus. I asked the questions yesterday, because i am confused on those issues and personally want to make decisions that will direct me down the correct path leading to Jesus. Everyone interprets the Bible differently...so i welcome the various opinions. Once again, what i wrote or questioned regarding my situation is in no way a reflection on any of the previous comments.

Anonymous said...

This is all incorrect. And it doesn't matter about the "Except portion" spoken of in this discourse.

This is a doctrine of the devil. Look at the very first comment. It led someone to leave God. Those are not Gods ways. Read the below website to see what is REALLY happening. And it fits in with the "except" clause too.


http://www.divorcehope.com/canchristiansremarryafterdivorce.htm

Anonymous said...

This is the except clause. it fits in perfectly with what Jesus is saying.

http://morechristlike.com/except-for-%20fornication-clause-of-matthew-19-9/

That guy interpreted it in correct, this website: Interprets it correctly.
http://www.divorcehope.com/canchristiansremarryafterdivorce.htm

Joanne said...

Anonymous said: "This is a doctrine of the devil. Look at the very first comment. It led someone to leave God. Those are not Gods ways."

Jesus turned most people away because the truth was too hard. Are you saying he was going against God's will?

The point: Just because it turns people away does not mean it's not the truth. Christ said the way is narrow and only a FEW will find it. We must through much tribulation enter in to the kingdom of heaven.

Joanne said...

(I should have worded it "most people turned away from Jesus because the truth was too hard)

Luke said...

"Not very long ago, a woman-friend wrote to me saying, "I asked a pastor friend of mine what he thinks about remarriage after divorce. His answer was, 'The gospel is about grace, and grace means you can re-marry without shame.'"

That is NOT true!

How Grace Does Not Stop Remarriage from Being Sin—by Myron Horst

The topic of the church granting a remarried couple grace often comes up with the subject of divorce and remarriage.

The argument that the church can grant a remarried couple grace to continue in their remarriage relationship has become a stumbling block for many.

To understand grace better, I did an in-depth study of grace in the Bible. I found some interesting facts.

The main fact is that grace is from God. Most of the verses in the New Testament that use the word grace also state that it is from God or Jesus. Nowhere is there any verse that the church has any authority to grant another grace for their sins. We can bless another with God's grace, but not from us.

When the church grants another person grace in a sin area so that the sin is no longer viewed as sin, the church is setting themselves up as God and making the church equal with God.

This line of thinking has occurred before in Jeremiah 7:9-10: "Will ye steal, murder, and commit adultery, and swear falsely, and burn incense unto Baal, and walk after other gods whom ye know not; And come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, We are delivered to do all these abominations?"

They thought they had received grace to continue in their sins but they had not.

Grace is not an allowance to sin a little more than what the Bible says.

Grace is not a license from God or the church for one to continue in sin as many would lead us to believe.

Grace is not God overlooking our sin as we continue to sin after we know better.

Romans 6:1-2 "What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?"

Romans 6:15 "What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid."

There is no grace for those who willfully continue to sin and don't want to stop or change because it would be "too difficult."

God's grace is not a license to do what is right in one's own eyes, and follow one's own beliefs, even if it is contrary to Scripture.

Who forgives sin? Can Christians grant forgiveness for sin against God? No. We can only grant forgiveness for offences to us.

We cannot grant a person grace for offences that they are committing against God when they have not repented to God and stopped their sin.

When Jesus through grace forgave the woman caught in adultery, He also told her to do something. He said "go and sin no more!" Jesus did not give the woman grace so that she could continue to commit adultery. Jesus told her she had to stop committing adultery.

When a divorced and remarried couple repents and receives forgiveness from God for the adultery that they have committed, they must change so that they can also obey Jesus' command to go and sin no more.

If they go on sinning and committing adultery they will not receive God's grace but rather incur His judgment. There cannot be grace and mercy without justice.

When a person realizes that they have sinned by divorcing their spouse and remarrying another, and they go to God and confess their sin and forsake the sin of remarriage, God forgives them.

It is only through the grace of God that they receive forgiveness. Without God's grace none of us would be saved because we have all sinned and come short of the glory of God.

"A wife is married to her husband as long as he lives."
1 Corinthians 7:39

Find the TRUTH at:
http://www.cadz.net/mdr.html

Sushannah Rodgers said...

Yahuah (that's God's name) has absolutely written it upon my heart that divorce & remarriage is adultery! My husband divorced me after only 2 1/2 years of marriage. I didn't want to be divorced, but he had made up his mind. He had a girlfriend and when we went together to finalize the divorce, I discovered she was pregnant with his child.

I knew it was wrong to marry this person; yet, I went through with it, anyway. I would strongly caution anyone who has these feelings NOT to marry the person! But I did and I'm paying for it for the rest of my life1

Oh, I TRIED to re-marry - 4 times!!! I wanted to find happiness with someone, but everyone I thought would be RIGHT for me turned out VERY WRONG!

The first one was very abusive, both verbally and physically. I had to run away from him! the 2nd one was an alcoholic womanizer! He ended up in bed with my brother's wife!

Number 3 was another very abusive man, who started out being an extremely romantic poet. He was also bi-polar and molested one of my children. Again, I had to flee, taking my children with me - this time across the Atlantic, because he was Irish!

The last one had a violent temper and I never knew what might trigger it. He KICKED my poor little dog, a dachshund, destroying her spinal cord, and she has been crippled ever since. He had done abusive things to me, also, once knocking me down with a door by slamming it into me. He ended up pitching a violent temper tantrum and leaving me on January 1, 2009.

I know in my heart that I'm not a difficult person to live with and yet, all these men, the last two of whom claimed to be Christian, were unconverted and IMPOSSIBLE for ANYONE to live with.

As a last resort, I consulted the Scriptures for an answer to my dilemma. What I found has already been quoted on this forum. A divorced person who re-marries commits adultery - end of story.

I ended up writing a song about this called, "Be Kind to the Wife of Your Youth." In it, I quote Matthew 19:9. "Any man who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery." Why can't people, MYSELF included, simply believe these words?

HeathersCorner said...

Okay come on now you have to admit, it makes as much sense as if you steal an apple or 1,000 dollars. The saying the smaller one is of less evil is pure ridiculous to say.
Heatherscorner

hildafunk said...

Its not very clear, because people who love the Lord have been debating this for two thousand years. You sound so phasarical and have that same tone that all the rest of the no remarriage camp has. I can see both sides and struggle with whether there is any mercy for the innocent party.......you and your peeps dont want tp minister....you want to say "look at me, im not like those sinners, in fact i dont sin at all and if i did mine is covered and acceptable.becauase its on the good list. It's crap.

Anonymous said...

I've got it...finally...if you are concerned about marrying a divorced woman or currently married to a divorced woman, all you have to do is kill her former spouse...then, due to his death, she being remarried is perfectly fine...now, you can ask for forgiveness of murder and be forgiven and it will be perfectly acceptable to be married to her.
Seriously??? This message of hate that you are speaking is corrupt and 100% detrimental to the true message that Christ brought to his people.

Anonymous said...

Did you forget the exception clause before this? I think you did. You are misinterpreting scripture and hence discouraging others by overspiritualizing yourself like a Pharisee does and putting a burden/yoke of bondage on others that you wouldn't even be willing to carry yourself, and possibly leading some astray - You can't just take one part of a verse, you have to take the whole verse.

Anonymous said...

So, you also could potentially be saying that it is okay to marry a divorced man, but not a divorced woman, right? Does that make sense?

Anonymous said...

NOT ALL DIVORCE MEANS YOU HAVE TO STAY SINGLE!

"MY PEOPLE ARE DESTROYED FOR THEIR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE."

READ THE BIBLE PEOPLE - DIVORCE IS NOT WRONG IN ALL SITUATIONS
I.E. ABANDONMENT BY AN UNBELIEVER AND INFEDILITY.

READ THE BIBLE.

READ THE BIBLE.

READ ALL VERSES PERTAINING TO THIS SUBJECT AND NOT JUST THE ONES THAT SUIT YOUR LEGALISTIC VIEWS!

Anonymous said...

Since God allows divorce in certain circumstances (i.e. abandonment by unbelieving spouse/adultery), he is freeing you from that marital contract/bond, IF, it is a biblical divorce for one of the reasons above.

In other words, if you got remarried, God would recognize the new marriage because the previous one no longer exists due to the sin of the other person (i.e adultery and unbelieving spouse departing.)

The only place where it is commanding a wife/husband to reconcile is where the divorce is not recognized by God; hence, that is where adultery occurs.

WHY is this so hard for people to understand when it is so CLEARLY written in the scripture?

It's not meant for interpretation but to read and understand the Holy Scriptures at face value and what they are intended to mean!

The Bible is very clear on the subject of divorce/remarriage (and it is okay in the cases indicated above) - no need for any extensive thesis on what this subject means.

"CHRISTIANS" NEED TO QUIT PUTTING LEGALISTIC YOKE ON YOUR BRETHERN AND SISTERS IN CHRIST! QUIT TRYING TO "OVERSPIRITUALIZE" THIS SUBJECT. QUIT JUDGING AND LOOK AT YOURSELF AND AREAS WHERE YOU MAY BE SINNING!

Anonymous said...

I'm getting tired of people saying, "Don't judge. Just love like Jesus did!" When people are quoting Jesus' own words, such as Matthew 5:31-32 ("“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."), no one's judging anyone. They are merely affirming what Jesus already said. Jesus made the judgement already that "whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery". It's merely repeating what he said. That's pretty black and white obvious. People these days have twisted the meaning of "don't judge" to mean if you stand for anything then you are judging me. When God's word specifically speaks out against something it is God who is judging and we can definitely uphold that judgment. If I go and tell you that riding in green Honda Civics is wrong then you can say that I should not judge you because that is my own personal judgement and not God's.

Joanne said...

Anonymous - I appreciate what you said about judging.

Exnihilo said...

What if the husband is an abusive tyrant who ends up leaving her? Mean to say the next guy to come along can't complete his life by marrying her and fulfilling hers as well? Come on. This is the type of thing which turns me off to fundamentalism. It's like most Christians can't think for themselves. God gave you a brain. How about you start using it for once?

Open-Hearted Atheist said...

The frustrating thing about fundamentalists and taking the bible literally is that it is completely hypocritical. Those people who go to fundamentalist Baptist churches (and there are divorced/remarried people who go there) have no issue with this...yet they will get high and mighty about gay people. Really? They claim to live by a true reading of the bible...yet they pick and choose which passages to abide by. Why is it so hard to just live your life and let others live there. It will be for God to decide what's right or wrong. And putting people down and being part of a group that is exclusive instead of inclusive is only going to weigh against them in the end. It amazes me that people profess to know what God "meant". Why can everyone just love? They said to Jesus when they were trying to trick him up, 'What is the Great Commandment?' And he of course, said to love God and to love one another. The Great Commandment is to love. So stop picking and choosing, and stop saying you're a Christian when you don't live like a Christian (with love in your heart) and make the world a kinder place to live for everyone. Divorced, remarried, gay, single parent, whatever. Everyone deserves to be loved.

Anonymous said...

I can't remember if I made the previous anonymous reply to your comment or not, I might have but I'm not sure if I did or not. Either way, I wanted to say that though it sounds like you sincerely want to honor the Lord in choosing to remain celibate now, and desiring to honor the Lord is commendable, but you may want to really consider whether you are going about it in the right way.

I believe scripture is clear, that if you can't control certain sexual urges it is better to marry, if you have Biblical grounds to remarry, in order to avoid falling into temptation and sexual immorality.

If you are finding the celibate life to be difficult you may not have the gift of celibacy, and therefore it would most likely be better for you to ask the Lord to help you truly examine whether you have Biblical grounds to remarry in order to avoid the temptation to commit sexual sin.

May the Lord give you understanding and guidance concerning this matter.

Heather Corner said...

Hi
Marriage is just a stepping stone to the end, you may have to go through 4-5 partners before you are living the exhale of marriage.

It may takes years of learning, and moving from partner to partner before you have found the true one.

So what promise you made to each other on that special day, was no more then just a fling of emotions. Most will end up with 2-3 partners (marriages) before you leave this world.

Help said...

My ex cheat on me and married the woman does this makes me free to remarry?

Joanne said...

"Help" - whoever marries you will be marrying a divorced woman. Jesus said clearly that marriage makes two people ONE and "whoever marries a divorced woman is committing adultery." The New Testament says you have two options: remain single or be reconciled to your husband.

Anonymous said...

Yes adultery is a sin. So are many things. We will sin until the day we die. You must confess Jesus Christ as your Savior and try and live as much like him as you can..but you will always sin again. Have an intimate relationship with Christ. Constant downgrading yourself for sin and wondering if you are going to hell is also a sin. Trust in Christ that he is our Savior. That is what he wants.

AJ Johnson said...

The word of God is final it says in context when addressing marriage and divorce Christ never gave permission to women to divorce their husbands if you read the word it says whosoever divorces HIS WIFE saving for the cause of fornication causes her to commit adultery and the man who marries her commits adultery(Matthew 5:32) then in the same book Matthew 19:9 says it again but if you read further his disciples said if the case of the man be so with his wife it is not good to marry then Jesus says all men cannot receive this saying save they to whom it is given. Even the books of Mark 10:11-12 says the same but this time says if a woman divorces her husband and marries another she commits adultery. Luke 16:18 also says the same whosover DIVORCES HIS WIFE and marries another commits adultery and whosoever marries her that is DIVORCED FROM HER HUSBAND commits adultery so please pray and let the holy Spirit lead you do not be decieved God's word is final and it is for reproof and education and exhortation and rebuke so please study and God bless.

Anonymous said...

I am in your same situation and I have the same feelings as you do. I can't understand how God would want us to live miserable and alone for the rest of our lives. I believe in my heart that God makes exceptions. After all the adultress was caught in the act and was to have been stoned to death. But Jesus showed her mercy.

Heather Corner said...

Hi
If God joined you in marriage, as it says let no man part them, yes he does allow you to leave the marriage, but only his way, 1. never get married again, 2 separate and wait,.
Now dont change his words to make yourself feel better. As he told the woman, go sin no more. not go marry try again.
Sorry sometimes the truth hurts, so if you want to divorce read about divorce, it states very simple what Jesus says about it, don't ad anything more or less of his words, or you commit blasphemy, the very unforgiving sin for all times.

Exnihilo said...

I'm 52 years old and I've never married. Virtually every woman who's single and approximately my age is either separated or divorced. I feel that I've been rejected by women for my entire life until recently. Must I remain single until I die? I cannot bear the pain much longer. I'm lonely. I have needs, and not just sexual. How cruel to tell me I'm going to go to hell and lose my salvation if I marry a woman, and the woman I have in mind was in an entirely abusive relationship. He was verbally and emotionally abusive to their child, who was very ill. Their child was seriously ill. The husband blamed the son's illness on not having enough faith in God. Such cruelty! Seems to me that a woman would be free to remarry following marriage to such an abusive husband. What is the spirit of the law here? I'd like to get past the legalism. Let's not act like the Pharisees did. Can any pastors here answer this question?

Anonymous said...

@ Joanne.

It seems you are not including the whole passage or passages of the entire page. There are two exceptions that are clearly written peopel have repeatedly brought up BUT YOU REFUSE TO RESPOND TO THAT and it is DISHONEST to do so. Remember what They say about adding or taking away to the bible one bit.? Not to do it correct?

jabp said...

I get tired of hearing people condem those who remarry. It's almost like you just read the bible for the words, but don't actually listen to the bible. Those who remarry or marry a divorced woman will not go to hell.
Read this article written by a preacher. He examines the marriage, divorced, remarriage. Let's dispel the self-righteous here, for that is a greater sin. http://www.jesusfamilies.org/Articles/Divorce.htm

Anonymous said...

My wife and I celebrated our 45th anniversary. She was a divorcee with children. If God judges me a sinner so be it. I will not trade her or our children for eternal life or for the promisees of heaven.

hildafunk said...

Myron Horst is a douche bag. His self righteousness is amazing....check out his article " why I don't own a t.v."....but he owns a computer... I can find much more evil on a computer. He beckons to early Church fathers like they couldn't possibly be wrong... yet Paul was dealing with apostasy in his own churches... how much more after the passing of the last apostle.

hildafunk said...

What's your stake in all of this Heather?? While I agree with you, you are just one of those remarriage trolls that goes from site to site condemning the remarried...what the fuck do you care about this issue so much for? Why can't you just go queer bashing like the rest of the modern Evangelical church? Probably because you haven't committed this sin

Anonymous said...

If it is true that one is bound to their spouse as long as that person is alive, then, I have a solution (albeit, it's not pretty). Murder their ex-spouse. Then, they are no longer bound to the Law and all you have to do is not murder again (repent). Hey, didn't David do that? So, there you have it. I mean, if remarrying someone constitutes as unforgivable in God's eyes, then I'd rather kill and be forgiven than remarry and be condemned to hell. It's so simple, the clause is there (and that cannot be denied)... murders will not inherit the Kingdom of God, but that's based on the fact that they continue to murder. Kill once and then repent. Right? Seems extreme but hey, salvation hangs in at stake here.

seektheway said...

I assume you're being sarcastic when you say you can just murder your spouse and then you are free to remarry. One problem with that thinking, you will probably go to prison for the rest of your life and not able to be in a relationship with anyone.

Anonymous said...

Yeah but at least that ex-wife murderer won't go to hell because God forgives ex-wife or ex-husband murderers, whether in prison or not as long as they ask for forgiveness, right? But God will send you to hell if you stay married to your spouse (who was once divorced) even though you have asked for forgiveness and both are serving God?! THIS is all absolutely LUDICROUS!! Jesus never intended for God's word to be chewed up and spit out like this. This kind of crap was what was going on before Jesus sacrificed his life! The Pharisees were doing just this and look what it got them, eternal scorn by Jesus. Jesus died for each and every sin. In fact he also died for the people that are saying Jesus was telling men to divorce their wives if she was previously married to another. But Jesus DID NOT say "if you did marry a divorced woman you better commit another sin and divorce your so called wife or you are going to hell! "
A bible theologian told me recently referring to what people say, "there is no record of the breaking up of second marriages but that doesn't mean that it didn't happen". Theologian said, "I have always had a strong belief that in matters where God feels strongly about our conduct, He makes it very clear with teaching and example. We have neither for breaking up second marriages. My belief is that if it's perpetual adultery to be married to a divorced person and if it were really a case of sin and a matter of salvation, God would have made it very clear. But he didn't do that. In my mind, it comes down on the side of opinion, option and tradition, not doctrine. So if the Bible says a lot about divorce and remarriage, but says nothing about breaking up second marriages, then that is significant". Think about that.
And by the way referring to Romans 7: 2-3 A married woman is united with her husband under the Law while he is alive. But if her husband dies, she is released from the law concerning her husband. So then if she lives with another man while her husband is alive, she is committing adultery but if her husband dies she's free from the law so she won't be committing adultery if she marries someone else.
Can you see the word FORMER husband is not what it says, it says husband not ex-husband? People were divorcing in those days. In fact, it was a chronic problem with the Pharisees. Divorcing is totally severing the bond with a spouse. God recognized and still recognizes divorce. Marriage is marriage and divorce is divorce. People are failing to interpret Gods word correctly. And this is just one part. Saying and adding things that the Bible is not saying. However, words that are black and white are being ignored as if they are not there. Such as "God hates divorce" and " it is an abomination to remarry your former spouse after marriage and divorce to another". And "husbands do not divorce your wives!" And also I've heard people say God doesn't mind if you divorce your second spouse who was divorced when you married them because he only hates the divorcing of a first spouse. That is absolutely a cult! A brainwashing to say the least! Shame on those who tell people to divorce, shame.
I refuse to do something that is not written by God.
Sidney

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amina rooper said...

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Charlotte Marcott said...

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Anonymous said...

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Gina Armstrong said...

Ok question. I married a divorce man. We got a divorce and I got remarried to a man who has never been married. Is it a sin and are we adulterers because I married a divorced man? Or is it like I have never been married till now??

Shekina said...

Dear people out there, my name is Shekina from Germany i had a problem with my husband 2year ago, which lead to our break up. when he broke up with me, i was not my self again, i felt so empty inside me and frustrated. until a friend of mine told me about a spell caster who helped her in the same problem too. i emailed Dr Stanley the spell caster and i told him my problem and i did what he asked of me, to cut the long story short. before i knew what was happening my husband gave me a call and told me that he want to come back to me just 2days after the spell was cast and was so happy to have him back to me. we have two kids together and we are happy with our selves. thanks to Dr Stanley for saving my marriage. You can contact him if you need his help via his email address drstanleyspelltemple@hotmail.com or his phone number +2348038139297

Joanne said...

Gina Armstrong: according to Christ, your first marriage was adultery. It might have been considered a marriage in the eyes of our civil law, however it was not a marriage to Christ. You are free to have a legitimate marriage.

Leo Jennifer said...

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muhammad kamran said...

Love you

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Anonymous said...

Just kill your wife, get forgiveness, then marry who you want.....

rinse and repeat.

;)

Anonymous said...

OMG, i was joking, but this guy actually did it.

he killed his wife so he could marry another woman.

http://www.crimelibrary.com/blog/article/the-chris-coleman-family-massacre/index.html

he also killed his kids, not sure why he did that, you might say that was overkill.

boom boom

Anonymous said...



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